So, boys suck, right???

I have three boys; I love them dearly and with all my heart. So it pisses me off to no end when people assume I would be happier in life if there's a girl out of one of these twins gestating in my belly.

My husband assures me it's a natural response from people and that they don't mean it negatively. But it is hurtful and makes my boys seem insignificant - whether the speaker meant it to be or not.

I recently read another blog post (thank you Lisa K) that addressed the hurt that her boys felt when people "joked" about the mother's fourth (and final) child was "thankfully a girl." How must it feel to a child when even strangers speak down about them.

This doesn't just apply to boys either. One of my best friends has 5 (yes five) girls and is pregnant with Baby #6. She and her husband never find out their baby's gender during pregnancy so this adds to the "problem." Not only does she hear it over and over again about having five - soon to be six - children, she endures countless comments from family, friends and strangers who all assume they're simply breeding until they get a boy. He daughters are old enough to pick up on all of this and it just makes me want to slap everyone in the face and ask them how they think that makes this family feel.

I can't believe that people actually know how hurtful these assumptions can be (that would just crush all faith I have in Humanity). But we need to be more sensitive and think before we speak. What if the mother you're asking has lost a child in the past or struggled to become pregnant? How do you think it makes her feel when you assume she wants a girl or boy or whatever? I guess it's become part of our culture that the 2.5 kids should be one boy and one girl. When did we stop feeling like we've been blessed with a child - any child - and feel we deserve to have both ends of the parenting spectrum? Whatever happened to just appreciating the fact that you have a healthy little baby?

It just makes me sad that people unknowingly discount what children I have and assume that I'm not happy with my three little men: that my life as a mother won't be complete without a girl. Whatever is given to me I will take, and love and raise with all that I am. And I will be thankful for what lives and little beings have been entrusted to me.

To every one of my friends who has kindly wished a girl upon our family, please know that I accepted your wish knowing it came from a lovely place in your heart. But also know that it did sting a little to think you didn't think of my boys and how much I love them and how wonderful it would be to have more children just like them. That's all.